Dairy of psychological Stupid

Brande Roderic

2008-02-05T02:31:00.001-08:00

मैं इस की छूट मारना चाहता हूँ । साली कुतिया बहुत ही सुन्देअर हैं। इस की

2008-02-03T11:20:00.001-08:00

Entry for 27th august

2007-08-27T02:00:00.000-07:00

I am feeling little bit good today. Today, one of my necessary thing has been arranged. apart from this, I slept yesterday bit good. My doctor is right, I should look forward not behind. The time that has been pass, has been pass. It never can come back. But what about the thing that I often think that now I am too old to make a career. Will the company give the preference to the candidate who has competed his masters at the age of 31 years?!? I don't know. May be God and the world know the answer. But God is angry with me and I don't have dare to ask the world.

Entry for 23rd august

2007-08-23T06:56:00.000-07:00

I am feeling too much annoyed today. I am starving for the things that I deserve. Perhaps I am expecting much from my destiny. I don't deserve that much. I don't know. But I really want them. oh lord!!! please give me peace
Whatelse I should write? There is nothing more for today. I am feeling myself in too much anger and irritation. I am in too much fussy mood today. Money matters a lot.
My sister in law has talked about my job in HCL. But I know it is not going to yield a result because I am not that much educated. And who is responsible for not getting educated "MY MOTHER" Yes, She is only one who has ruined me. Fuck the world!!!!! I have lots of anger on her.

Continue of the last post

2007-08-23T06:48:00.000-07:00

If she is not arranging the things that I need, she will arrange them later. Because she too understands the necessity of them. My this thinking been the biggest mistake of my life and fatal too. untill I understood the fact, it was too late. I had became the paitent of deprssion, anxiety and nervesness. She even don't understand the necessity of my medicine.
I am still giving a try to get what I had always desired but for the last time because afterwards I won't have time. I even may have to commit suicide.
A sense of insecurity of stolen my sleep. And this sleepnessness has given me many phobias.
In the beginning, I had only one thing to fight with. Now I have lots of things to fight. Hey God please help me. I beg you. I am so depress that if you say I can even lick after spitting.

Some facts about my life

2007-08-22T03:41:00.000-07:00

I have been cheated by my destiny. I had no idea what aa game destiny is about to play wity me. A Game in which defeat mean a death with life. I have become like a wonded dog who got wound in an accident and now there is nobody to show sympathy with him. people are kicking him instead because he is smelling now. I am trying to release some of my pain thru this entry. May God give me peace!!!!
When I was 17. And just had passed my 12th class, I had lots of dreams about my future because I had faith in my intellect in my only supposed to be well wisher and friend "my mother".
I don't know why I always like to prefer a smile on my face even when I am in great pain.
one reason can be like this, "because world don't like sadness. Because everbody is searching for happiness. So they want to associate with cheerful person only" But one can't be happy all the time. At some moments he needs somebody who knows his soul. I don't know, why I am not able to express myself that well
Well, lets talk about my mother. She totally been fail to understand me. She has played a vital role in my ruin. She never arranged me things which were necessary for my career. Though I know it was easy for me to arrange them but I had a illusion that I have got the best mother so I I don't need to worry.